No, it’s not a superpower, sorry.

The Art of Persuasion can be learned and simply needs a little practice. But practice doesn’t make perfect. We need to continually learn and practice what we learn to grow.

If mere repetition of something was all it took to get better, you’d think we’d get better at being only as good as we currently are.

I like real estate investing. It’s fun for me. My favorite part is where I get to be creative and find ways to make profit where most people wouldn’t think it possible. Most novice and uneducated investors only concern themselves with 2 things: buying low and selling high. While that is a great strategy, it’s not very creative and typically limits your playing field.

Unlike persuasion’s *evil* brother, manipulation, being a persuasive person can get you things you want while also helping others get what they want.

In real estate, I use persuasion when talking with a seller to not only get what I want, but give the seller what they truly are wanting and not what they are saying they are wanting. Many times I can see ways a deal could be put together in a more creative way which prospers both of us. It’s my job then to persuade the seller to see things my way.

Example: Using Persuasion To Get What You Want

Let’s say I want to buy a house that’s listed at $300,000 but my bank will only lend me $250,000.

I talk with the seller and after listening for awhile, I might see he’s wanting to invest $50,000 from the proceeds of his house in a mutual fund that pays him 5%. It’ll be his first investment. Visually, I see he’s in his late 20’s and gather he likes traveling by all the vacation pictures on the wall. He also appears to be adventurous in those pictures.

So here’s what I gathered in this extremely simple example. The seller is adventurous and wants his money to go to work for him but probably doesn’t know too much about investments.

Being that I know investing, I might suggest a different investment strategy where he invests in mortgages, not mutual funds.

At first he says no, and they usually do. But I show him how holding a second mortgage on this house for $50,000 will yield him 9% interest return on his equity and the kicker will be he gets this money paid to him monthly - which could then be used to pay bills or invest in something else.

I talk to him in his language (selling his house and investing his money) showing him the benefits of my logic.

He accepts and it’s a win-win situation. He got what he wanted, the sale of his house and a good investment. I got what I wanted, a $300,000 house when a bank would only lend me $250,000.

Notice I used 4 out of the 5 keys to the art of persuasion: observing, listening, being knowledgeable, and timing. Timing because my timing was right for presenting this strategy to the seller.

The Final 3 Keys to Persuasion

If you are a business person / entrepreneur, having good persuasive skills in your back pocket is an invaluable tool for achieving success and wealth. Let’s continue on from where we left off from part 1 of our persuasion series.

Our first 2 keys to the art of persuasion were using effective storytelling and observation to persuade people. The final 3 keys are:

• Being Knowledgeable
• Listening
• Timing

Being Knowledgeable

Variety

Learn as much as you can about a variety of subjects. Often times you will need to reference other situations to show how what you’re talking about works well in other ways. This shows the person you’re trying to persuade that your logic is sound and proven so.

Know History

Remember and reference the past. Been there done that, this is what happened. Show the person you are trying to persuade how things have ended up before and how your way will avoid repeating the past.

Classical Conditioning

Use Classical Conditioning when trying to persuade someone to see your point of view.

Ivan Pavlov studied how animals and people relate things together. When we don’t understand something but it is related to something we do understand, we see it in a new light and now relate the two – thus understanding.

This often times can promote an emotional response. You can use this to your advantage. Relate things you want someone to believe with something they like and on the flip side, relate things you don’t want them to believe with things they don’t like.

For example, let’s say you want someone to believe investing in real estate is better and safer than investing in the stock market.

You might say, “Investing in the stock market is like driving in a car at night with no headlights and your steering went out; you are driving blind and can’t really predict where your profit will end up. However, real estate investing is more like reviewing the menu at your favorite restaurant; you have plenty of options and can clearly see how your food will be prepared and delivered. In other words, you can see how and where your profit will be coming to you.”

Ok, maybe there’s a better example out there but I’ve made my point. Associate what you want them to believe with good things and associate what you don’t want them to believe with the bad.

Listening

Read Between the Lines

Listening is tricky.

Simply listening to what someone is telling you is not enough. You have to read between the lines. Listen for what they are not saying and what they are really meaning.

Are they saying they want to buy a SUV because they have kids or are they really meaning they want to buy a SUV because safety is key for their family? By listening and reading between the lines you will be able to talk to them in a language they will understand.

Can you see how this might benefit you if you were a car salesmen?

Don’t Forget What Your Heard

If pen and paper are handy, jot down ideas that come to your mind while talking, otherwise you might forget them. Politicians do this all the time.

Timing

If the person you are trying to persuade is in a bad mood to begin with, postpone the conversation until they are in a better mood.

If while talking you see the other person getting heated over the subject, try to diffuse the anger quickly. Make a joke, reference something funny, do whatever you can to quiet their anger. If you can’t, break off the conversation until the person has cooled down.

An angry mind is in attack mode, not listen and understand mode.

Poking Holes In Their Argument

Listen for words like: uh, umm, well . . . , I guess so, I’m not sure.

While talking with the person, listen for areas they aren’t sure of. This is the perfect time to talk about that area. They are already a little shaky there and if you stir up more of unsure feelings they will have an unsure stance.

Reassure Them They Are Smart When In Agreement

Turn it around and do the opposite of poking holes in their argument.

People like to think they are right. When you hear them arguing their point in a direction you want them to go in or you agree with, agree with them and make them feel good, BUT, be careful not to do this too much, otherwise they will feel they are right.

Give them just enough to know you understand their point of view, many people need that before they can adapt to yours. This also helps them see you as a reasonable and logical person. To them, their point of view is logical and reasonable and by agreeing with them on a few points they will begin to see you are a logical and reasonable person.

Stay Cool or Save Your Fight For Another Time

Stay calm and collected when trying to persuade someone. Getting heated and firing off attacks will only make them put up a wall that you will never break through. At that point, it doesn’t matter how sound your argument is, everything you say will probably bounce right off them.

The Round Up

So there you have it; my 5 keys to The Art of Persuasion - storytelling, observing, being knowledgeable, listening, and timing.

The art of persuasion is something we can all learn, and with a little practice, we can use it to get what we want and hopefully allow others to get what they want. As a business owner / entrepreneur, it is a powerful tool you can use to achieve success and wealth.

In part 3 of this series we will focus on a few great tips I have to remember while trying to persuade someone to see the light of your way of thinking.

Can you think of any other techniques we can use to persuade people to see and accept our point of view (without using manipulation)?

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